Lost Soul

I feel as cold and barren as these winter tree branches.

When I started my blog a year ago I wanted it to be a place where I could share my images and give people a place to visit that was uplifting.

The last 8 months have been difficult but my faith in God had kept me strong.

I have enjoyed quiet moments with Him and found beauty in the small things.

I have attempted to pass this on here.

Lately my spirits are lagging

I have become depressed

I don't have anything positive to pass on

so

I just don't come here.

I feel like this lonely tree

alone

waiting

wondering

when is God going to move?

I have been here before, I know He always comes through. Actually I have always been blessed beyond what I have hoped for. But for now my human brain just can't take this waiting.

The fear (that I thought I had dealt with) won't let me go right now. I am afraid my husband will not get a job. That we are going to loose our house (this, we are pretty sure of) so I will loose my studio. Will I find a job? How do I look for one? What can I do? I have never filled out a resume. 27 years working for myself. How will this affect my daughter who is a junior in high school? On one hand I want to start a new life, in a different place. An adventure! I want to be used by God, to do what ever He wants us to do. I get my hopes up, get used to the idea if moving, but then my husband finds out he didn't get the job. A job I thought would be a dream job for him. Finally, his turn to have his dream. God wants us to have our hearts desires, right?

I know all the answers to these questions. I know God is faithful. I know things will turn out for the best.

But right now,

In this time

I'm afraid to hope.

I feel like this old shoe I found in my woods. A Lost Soul.

I know things will happen in His time and I should be expectantly waiting but for now I just need to be quiet and listen. Please pray my for peace of mind.

Thank you!